Archive for May, 2010

Questions And Things To Ask On A First Date

You want to seem calm and comfortable on your first date. But your mind rise above with the fear of rejection and insecurity. You get nervous of any m...

 

You want to seem calm and comfortable on your first date. But your mind rise above with the fear of rejection and insecurity. You get nervous of any mistake done by you on your first date. You get anxious. It can be a nightmare for shy people and for those who want to make an impression on the first date. You should not go on the date thinking that you are going to get your life partner. Try to be relaxed. Just think that you are going to meet with an acquaintance and you both will have a great time together and will come to know about each other, your common habits. And get to know that whether you can invest time for your second date or not. Following, we are discussing some questions to talk about on your first date. Find out…

 

 

Age

 

It can be a sensitive issue asking about the age on the first date, and can make wrong and ugly impression. But during your first date, however you would be interested and curious enough to know the age of the person. You can do this but follow some tricks. Don’t ask this pointedly. Between your conversations, you can discuss about school or colleges. And you can ask ‘when did you pass your High School?’ And then you can figure it out. Knowing about the age is mandatory. You should know the right age of the person you are dating with, before proceeding further.

 

Job

 

You should not feel shy asking this simple question about the job. It’s very normal to face this question as well as to ask this. And you can proceed with your conversation easily. Moreover, discussing about the job is good thing. Then from the job, you will get more topics to talk about, about college, teachers, hostels, friends, etc. It’s just that the other person want to know more about you and your interest.

 

Family

 

Some people don’t feel comfortable discussing about families on the first date. But if you discuss about the family on the first date, it shows that you are a family person. Don’t go in much depth, but you can talk about general things. Because the other person will also be uncomfortable and shy on the first date, you might not get many questions. That way you can have an idea about his/her personality. What kind of relationship he/she shares with the family. But keep in mind that if you feel that the other one is feeling uncomfortable discussing about the family, then you should ignore this and talk something else.

 

Favourites

 

It’s so lovely and interesting to talk about the favourite things, hobbies or favourite pass times. If you like cricket, ask him/her which sports he/she likes? Talk about adventure trips, if you had any, or some other trips you went out with your friends or family. Talking about these things, you will come to know more and more about your partner on the first date. Talk about favourite hobbies, and tell about yours too.

 

Relationship Status

 

You both would be curious to know about the relationship status of each other or past relationships. It is not good and not even advisable to talk about these things on the first date. But many of us can’t resist. Instead of talking these things on your first date, you should wait for your further dates. It will make a good impression.

 

Avoid Pressure

 

Both parties should avoid unnecessary pressure. You both should try to make the atmosphere very easy and funny. Continuous questions can make it boring and uninteresting. This can create unwanted pressure and a feeling of discomfort in the atmosphere and then the first date become intolerable.

 

Be Casual

 

Do not behave extra ordinary. Be what you really are.  Be casual with the partner. Behave and talk in the way as you use to do with your friends. Nothing extra and special. In this way, the other person would feel more comfortable in your company and would look after for the second date to be very soon. You should not get formal like you are meeting with some colleague or senior. Remember, you have to make this date very special and you have to leave a long lasting impression. Then only you’ll get another chance for dating again.

 

Though, your first date is a very first step to start a new relationship but, you can get opportunity to leave a long lasting impression on your first date. So, you should provide your partner the opportunity to enjoy your amazing sense of humour, intelligence and charm. First date can create magic in your life. All you have to do is to be little careful. Don’t ask about unwanted things, don’t do anything embarrassing.

 

It can be a date to celebrate throughout the year. So, your conversation should flow very naturally and in an impressive manner. Remember that “First impression is the last impression”. You should try to understand each other. So guys don’t get afraid on your first date. Just go so confidently and leave your impression for the second date.

 

 

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Self Motivation – 10 Tips On How To Motivate Yourself

 

To work is an unavoidable need of all human beings. It is an activity running through the thread of life.

 

Irrespective of whether you have to earn the bread or not, work is unavoidable. At times in life we face lack of self motivation which leads us towards a state of restraint and avoidance of work.

Avoidance of work might slowly lead one towards physical and psychological disorders; hence one should always try and keep doing something or the other.

 

Many a times when such drudgery creeps in life one needs to practice self-motivation in order to get going again.

The more constructive and focused the work, the more radiant the personality becomes.

 

What keeps you motivated to do your work with zeal and enthusiasm?

 

Interest and affinity towards the work is what makes you do it. Any work devoid of the interest would make it full of fatigue and subsequently a big burden in the long run.

 

Motivating our own self and trying to fill up the chores of life with love and enthusiasm, is the key to keep working with interest. But many a times we find that stagnancy creeps in our lives.

It kills the liveliness of the personality or makes many negative traits creep in the personality. At such times it becomes important that you pull yourself out of the negative state of mind and practice some self-motivation techniques at all times of existence as gaining back lost motivation, at such times, looks like an uphill task. 

 

Let us take a look at 10 simple, non energy consuming activities and thoughts on how to motivate yourself that will help you achieve self motivation and liking towards life in general.

 

1.      Give yourself the gift of an activity which you love to do.

 

Find it out, the thing which is close to your heart.  

 

If it is not on your daily chores list, take out time for it. Set out as minimum as 10 minutes for it in a day.  Try to keep it at an hour when you are high on energy. The accomplishment of your activity would elevate your mood and you’ll see that you will be able to complete some mundane activities willingly after that.

 

The love of that activity and the satisfaction of having it done for the day will make you complete the other activities as well and give you immense self motivation to look ahead at the day.

 

Once you start finishing an activity or two in a day, you’ll see how energy and enthusiasm creeps in slowly, without your knowledge enhancing and uplifting your zeal to work.

 

2.      Try and divide the work you detest, in simple steps.

 

Divide and conquer. Yes, it works for sure.

 

Sometimes it happens that you dislike doing the daily chores, at such times try dividing the work in a sequence of steps.

For some days just think of implementing the steps as they are. Slowly you will feel self motivated to do them effortlessly and will realize that the work which looked laborious becomes easy and doesn’t look so mountainous.

 

3.      Do a chore for someone else.

 

Many a times we find that we cannot lift our zeal up and lack enough self motivation to do the activities concerning ourselves. It is definitely a sign of chronic boredom and passivity turning into depression. At such times if we are required to perform an activity for somebody else, we usually do that, even though we might not be willing to do it. The reason for doing chores for others, even though you are not willing can be many but, what makes a difference is that you had  utilized that time of yours which might otherwise got just whiled away.

 

So, even if you can manage to give a little time of yours to help someone else. Take notice of the time spent fruitfully and notice that you are not such a big procrastinator. This, in the long run acts as a great self motivator, though it might not look like one in the beginning.

 

 

4.      Do some activity each day which you don’t want to do.

 

No matter how pressed and down you feel, just do one chore unwillingly.

 

Try to do it first thing in the morning. Some form of physical exercise or breathing exercise is the apt thing to do in the morning hours which builds up self motivation in a few weeks.

 

Keep it simple, very simple. Do it for as little as five minutes only to begin with. You’ll be surprised how it helps instilling sense of responsibility in you. You’ll slowly see you can do the same activity effortlessly for a considerable more time.

 

5.      Set aside just a span of 5 minutes for your grooming.

 

Each one of us is a beautiful being; the pressures of life make us forget it.

So many times we neglect ourselves so much that we even forget to wash our face or to groom ourselves again in the whole day once we’ve taken the bath.

 

Try any one of the self grooming activity and see the freshness you gain. Wash the face properly; and put on body cologne. Do it for as little as 2 minutes. Grooming yourself acts as a best self motivation technique as what comes with it, a confidence in your own looks and yourself.

 

6.      Snack one thing which you like daily.

 

A small fruit or a small chocolate, but remember, a small serving, not a big overdose. Make it a part of your meal.

 Keep yourself craving for that one thing you would like to devour. It builds up desire.

 

There is one advice especially for the housewives; stop eating the leftovers, or just don’t eat because otherwise the food might go waste. In case the food is going waste, remember that “Food going to the waste is better than going to the waist”.

 

7.      Negate the negative thought.

 

As and when, you notice it; the negative thought you’re brooding on, just negate it.

 

Don’t bother even if you are noticing it in a day, or 60 hours or ten days or 15 days. As soon as you are aware that you are into negative thinking process, just make it affirmative. Just say the opposite of whatever negative you were thinking.

 

Even if you say it once, it makes the difference. It changes the direction of the thought process, at the subconscious level. This is one self motivating process which gives tremendous benefits at all areas of life.

 

 

8.      Give yourself compliments. Don’t wait for others to do that.

 

Taste your food. If it is good tell yourself it is.

 

If you feel you are looking good, let yourself know.

 

If you’ve finished a chore successfully, pat yourself for achieving it.

 

Don’t wait for others to notice it or give you compliments.

 

When you will start self motivating yourself and will start noticing your own efforts thus keeping yourself happy, you’ll notice that even people have started noticing you.

 

Treat yourself important. Live your life. We all get it only once.

 

9.      Write this on a piece of paper “I AM GOOD” and place it at a conspicuous place. BELIEVE in it.

 

Just tell yourself” I am good”. Just keep telling it to you. And you’ll be surprised to see, how good and meaningful your life will become.

 

You can even try to write some of your positives and affirmations and read them aloud each morning for a span of 41 days. This self motivating exercise makes those affirmations creep into your subconscious mind and help you feel good at all major times.

 

10. Never forget to smile.

 

Your smile might be a reason for someone else to smile.

You never know what the other person might be going through; your smile might cheer up someone.

 

This is one great self motivating tip which elevates your mood instantly, though quiet subtly

 

Just look at yourself in the mirror. You look more attractive when you smile.

 

The 10 tips on self motivation are essentially a recipe for success if followed with great zeal. The deciding factor between every won or loss has always been the motivation. People who are self motivated are determined enough to get what they have set themselves for. Develop the habit of Self motivation and success would start to follow you immediately. Just try the above 10 tips on self motivation.

 

 

Picture- Έλενα Λαγαρία

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