Honest and Sincere Appreciation is the most effective tool used sparingly by majority of people. The effectiveness of this tool has been undermined by many due to various reasons. However the people who have used it efficiently have done wonders in their personal and professional life. This topic has got a full chapter dedicated in Dale Carnegie famous book How to Win Friends & Influence People. The author has used many examples to show why it means a lot to give honest in sincere appreciation in order to get best result out of your relationship or career. Beyond doubt this is the most effective tool you can use to impress people, change the situations, steer the results in your favor and most importantly make people think highly about you.
There are many illusions associated when it comes to appreciating someone. While your Inner self might be thumping out loud to go ahead and appreciate, the other part of your mind holds back you so strongly that you lose all courage at all the times. The main reasons for this includes
1) Fear of Rejection
2) Thinking it to be Cheap
3) Comparing it with Flattery
5) Thinking what other Might Think
6) Social Pressures
7) Thinking it to be Useless
8 ) Thinking it to be Out of Context
9) Thinking it be Needless
10) “I am the Best” Philosophy
This may not happen when you tend to appreciate
1) A Beautiful Car
2) Some Monument
3) A T.V. show etc.
Yes you tend to appreciate anything or everything except human beings. Why?
Aren’t they worthy of it? Well, They are very much worthy of it.
So what holds you back? Well, The mindset off course
While many authors including Dale Carnegie would tell you why you should appreciate someone, the biggest problem I have seen is that people don’t recognize the triggers and always fails on very basic art “How to Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation”. This is a 10 step procedure which would help you recognize the triggers and appreciate a person. But First the
Trigger- Many things that happen in our life are normal or monotonous. Seldom we see, experience, or feel something which is different. Trigger is something which gives us a feeling of awe. Develop a habit of it because this will be your most effective weapon in years to come
Now How to Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation
1) De-clutter your mind.
2) Think of the person and not any of the negatives about him/her.
3) Drop all your apprehensions and remain positive.
4) Proceed further and Kill the voice which says No.
5) Tell Yourself “I should” because this is just amazing.
6) Tell the person that you appreciate the act
7) Tell that how it made you felt good about it
8 ) Try to relate it with an incident and how the act has surpassed all expectations
9) Congratulate and tell them that it was beyond expectations
10) Thank him again for the much appreciated thing.
When I see something good by any team member or someone from different team I make sure to be positive and appreciate the act. I forget any negative about the person or bad experience I have with the person. My mind tries hard to remind me of bad things but I tell myself that I should definitely go. I do that not only to appreciate the person but also to make sure that the he keeps up the best spirits in future. I tell him that he has done an amazing thing which is way beyond the expectations. I congratulate him and tell him how this will influence things in time to come. I thank him again and tell him to keep the good things coming in future.
I have considered a scenario which you will encounter in your corporate life. However the basic would remain same if
1) You want to appreciate you loved ones
2) You want to appreciate a good service
3) You want to appreciate some good act
4) You want to appreciate something which is out of world.
Try It. It is the best weapon you can have in your arsenal.
Some More articles to supplement your Reading
Magic of honest and sincere Appreciation
Give Gold Stars. Show Your Honest Appreciation – Today
Give honest and sincere appreciation
Give honest and sincere appreciation-2