Long Term Effects Of Divorce On Children

One of the most common issues faced by the society today is the growing rate of divorces. More than the couple, the long term effects of divorce on children can be especially disastrous. “Divorce” can be defined as termination or dissolution of marriage by a legal process in which a judge or other authority dissolves the bonds of matrimony existing between two persons, thus restoring them to the status of being single and permitting them to get separated and marry other individuals, if they wish. Sometimes it happens in early stages of married life but sometimes, couple gets divorced after having children. Obviously, children break down emotionally when their parents go through a divorce. It can have really adverse effects on children, which may even last a lifetime.

Parents are adults and mentally strong enough to face the circumstances in the wake of divorce. But children are not necessarily mature enough to understand these aspects of life. There are many long term effects of divorce on the children’s mind, psychology and behavior which are as discussed below:-

1. Loss of Self Esteem: Sometimes children feel themselves to be the reason of divorce between their parents. They might feel that their mistakes caused their parents to live separately. Slowly, this thinking may culminate in loss of self esteem. They will always feel guilty and this may hamper their future. After losing self confidence, it is very hard to get it again. Lack of self confidence will create negativity in every aspect of the child’s life. This is an important long term effect of divorce on children.

2. Academic Life: If the child is a student, this divorce may have a major effect on his/her academic life. Parents’ divorce may lead to depression, disruption of normal life and lack of attention in the child. This will indirectly affect the child’s academic performance adversely.

3. Insecurity: Due to divorce of parents, a fear of their own abandonment may also come in the child’s mind. They have to live with only one of them. How and where they will go and what their next stage will be? All these questions make them feel insecure anywhere. Anxiety about the future may make him depressed. Instead of getting out of the problems,he/she may plunge deeper into them and may even lose mental stability. This is one of the worst long term effects of divorce on children.

4. Social Aloofness: Studies have shown in most of the cases, children after facing so many problems of divorce, loosetrust. Their behavior gets changed. They may like to stay away from everyone. They may shy away from building string friendships with anyone as they can’t trust anyone. They would not like to share their feelings with anyone for fear of betrayal. They may stay aloof from other people and in general shun company.

5. Personal Development Problems: This is also one of the long term effects of divorce on children. It badly affects the personal development of the children. Feelings of hurt, anger, loneliness, etc. at a tender age will result in negativity for everything. This, in turn, may hamper their psyche. This will indirectly affect their maturity, understanding and relationships. They may even go into chronic depression at a very young age.

6. Future Life: Divorce affected children often tend to have a very weak emotional base. They lose the ability to trust others. This affects their entire life. Many of them don’t get even married. Their life may get surrounded by such negativity, which may make their entire lives miserable. Long term effects of divorce on children has potential to disturb the future life in a very bad way.

In this way, these family breakages may destroy the whole life of an individual. Parents should understand their responsibility. After divorce also, if they pay attention and give same love to their child, they can prevent most of these problems. They may divorce from their spouses, but they should maintain strong relationships with their children. They should cooperate with each other as far the raising of their children is concerned.

There are many long term effects of divorce on children that vary from case to case. If effects of divorce are recognized at the early stage in the children then they must be taken care of promptly. The child should not feel that divorce is because of him. They should not feel lonely. Try to improve their self esteem. Help them to think positive. If these steps to take the child out of the trauma are not taken then child may go into depression, which could do great harm to them psychologically. There is a need to control long term effects of divorce on children. Better family and social support may help children to cope up with the divorce and the subsequent situations.

It is essential to make sure that a couple develops a mutual understanding of each other and a comfort level before they think of having children. This will ensure that these innocent flowers don’t suffer, if the couple feels that they are incompatible or can’t spend their lives together.

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