Managing Interpersonal Conflict

Interpersonal conflicts exist almost everywhere. At home, between children, husbands and wives, neighbours, friends etc. and at work it may be between co-workers, employees, employers. These interpersonal conflicts if not managed in a timely and adequate manner may result in severe consequences, physical and psychological both. They can spoil your relations with the others, may result in break-ups, may cause severe mental disturbance and distract your mind from work, make it impossible to concentrate on job and affect the performance. The disturbed mind might even result in severe life-taking accidents while driving on roads or operating industrial machines.

Creating conflict and managing them are mostly natural behavioural instincts of individuals which they develop during the years of own mental development. While the latter one may be the result of constant practise and intentional learning, the former one might have been developed as a result of multiple negative situations. Thus Managing Interpersonal Conflict can be a two way process, first avoiding the situations which cause this situation and another resolving them without any loss of relations, or losing mental balance.

Here are some tips on how you can manage interpersonal conflicts well, in your day to day life at home and work, and make your life stress-free, happy and long.

Try to Understand: It happens often that people get excited and react in a very harsh manner without having full information about the incident. They do repent later and say ‘sorry’ to the victims but this is not the right way to do the things. Those who are in responsible positions; do not react without understanding the situations and the reason behind them. They use their reason of managing conflict in stead of creating it, come what may.

Mind Your Language: Interpersonal conflict primarily starts from unfavourable words, then actions of others. Give yourself sufficient time to analyze the words or actions of others before retorting or retailing in the same manner. Try not to speak the words which you would not like to hear for yourself from others, never in a manner which is not chaste.

Mind Your Business: It has been noted that people who are not content with their own performance and outcomes often come across conflict at home and work. This happens because of their own irritation with themselves which they let out on others, especially on those whom they think they have right / authority to do so such as wives, children, parents, close friends, subordinates, and even on pets. Barking on a wrong tree is neither good nor useful. You need to take yourself in hand in such situations and concentrate on a way out of it, rather than letting the disappointment get over you.

Talk with others: Most of the problems arise in real world because we do discuss it with others openly, the way it should have and often indulge in our own deductions of the situations, or others behaviours. If you are facing such a situation which you think other or others are responsible for, the right way to solve it is discuss with them and resolve amicably. Remember getting angry and letting it spill over others would not solve the problem but can only intensify it and spoil it to cause greater damage.

Avoid Prejudices and Illusions: Sometimes we develop a particular image of other persons in our mind and judge all their statements and actions on that very ground only, which may not always be truth. We should be able to judge the persons and situations as per real-time developments only and that will give us a wider perspective to see the things in light of reality and avoid prejudices and illusions. You should also express your point of views before others in similar manner so that they can see you regardless of your previous image, prejudices in their mind. This can help very much in managing interpersonal conflicts.

Conflict at Work: Sometimes there is a person in your team who possesses negative bent of mind and is quite conflict-prone always. This dissatisfied soul would not only be spoiling his / her own job but affecting that of others, too. The good thing to do is keep these spoil sports away from other productive workers and use the first opportunity to bid them bye.

These were some suggestions which were meant to help you manage interpersonal conflict at home and work. Here are some ideas to get over the stress caused by conflicting situations:

- Learn to manage stress and distress in conflicting situations.

- Learn to recognize and control such emotions which give way to conflicts, in your behaviour and that of others.

- Learn to and concentrate on resolving it rather than simply managing interpersonal conflict.

Picture- progmetal